Thursday, 5 March 2015

Naming Your Child

Did anyone else REALLY struggle choosing names when the time came to it? Or have lots of names, but none for the sex of your child?!

In my head I had several names that I adored, and had always liked - but then I also had names I hated, just through association of others. I guess its harder when you work with children too, as you hear a name and instantly associate it to a child, usually for the worst reasons.

I found girl names SO much easier, but I don't know if that was psychological as I knew I was having a boy, therefore girl names just seemed nicer. I couldn't exactly have a son and call him "Sarah". That would just be odd, although unique, it would be odd.

The topic of naming our future child became a bit of an argument between myself and my partner. Traditionally on his side of the family, the eldest son or first born son's middle name is "John". Where as on my side of the family it was "Robert". I really wanted to include the name Robert in somewhere, as my dad didn't have any sons, only daughters, and so the tradition of carrying on the name pretty much died there.

I adored the name Bobby, and considered calling my son it. This was in homage to my late granddad who I was extremely close to, and adored. My partner wasn't too keen on the name. He liked the sentimental value, but the name was a iffy one, it wasn't a name he said "NO!" to, but it wasn't one he jumped at either. He did also point out that his initials would be "BJ" and coming from a girl who went to school with a "BJ" I could sympathise with the future taunting. I wanted to call him Robert instead of Bobby tho, as its more traditional and "proper". It would look better on a Qualification certificate when he gradated University as a Doctor (high expectations here!!), but we wernt too keen on the name Robert John, as we both had uncles who had this name, and it was as if we were naming him after them... Robert and Bobby were out of the equasion as a first name, and we were not very fond of double barrelled middle names - our son having 3 names in total...

I also liked the name Thomas. This was actually influenced by my time working at a nursery. There was an adorable child named Thomas who I had a real soft spot for. I just associated the name with the cute little lamb I used to look after. My partner disliked Thomas. He said something about it was his dads nickname at school - how this is/was possible ill never know as his dad's name is Stephen.... Anyway, I thought he was just being difficult, and so Thomas then ceased to exist.

I also liked the name "Jack" which too was a name we both liked, and also was in relation to my cousin who sadly passed away a few years ago. One problem tho. We had a dog called Jack. Not our choice of naming - hes a working dog and the name was given to him before we were given him. I couldn't exactly shout "JACK GET OFF THE SOFA OR ILL GIVE YOU A KICK UP THE BUM!!" The neighbours would think I was a horrid mum! And so Jack was swiftly knocked off the menu.

By now my 3 main names were all pretty much void, and every name my partner came up with I just wanted to beat him up over, or rip his head off with. He started suggestion names (no offence here) which I HATED - Leo, Leon and Levi being the 3 main ones.

I liked traditional strong names and so threw a few of those into the mix - Harry, William, George (George being scribbled off due to William & Kates son being named George earlier that year). I liked Teddy, but it was now too common. Where as Adam liked modern and different names - Zac, Chase, Henley, Hunter... All again which I just shook my head no to.

Why was this so difficult?! I scoured name books, googled baby boy names, downloaded apps on my phone (I must have spent a fortune!) and found nothing.

One evening, Adam arrived home from work, a few weeks away from my due date and as per usual over dinner I nagged him again for names. We weren't going to call our child a name yet, I wanted to see and meet him to decide what he would be called, but I at least wanted a few names in the lineup. That's when he dropped the "A" bombshell. Aiden. Aiden?. Aiden.

It was the only name he suggested that I didn't instantly poo-poo and say no to. I ran it through my head a few times, before through a mouthful of pizza, tell him it was a possible name.

Over the next few weeks that name stuck in my head, along with Bobby and Thomas. Although we had said no to them, they crept back in and stayed in the line up, along with the name Aiden. Once evening I were laying on the sofa watching TV when he began to kick. I placed my Doppler on and had a listen to him having a whoosh about before falling quiet again, I used to talk to him quite a bit, and told him of a few names we were considering, and repeated them over and over.... Thomas, Thomas, Thomas, Thomas. Nothing. Bobby, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby. Nothing. Aiden. Aiden. Aiden. Aiden. He let out a mighty kick. I tried it again, Thomas. Nothing. Bobby. Nothing. Aiden. Kick. Each time I said Aiden, I received a little kick. Had he personally chosen his name?!

I told my partner that night, and he just laughed. There was no way our unborn child had chosen his name already. We had several names lined up - Thomas, Bobby and Aiden. It was a waiting game to see which one would suit him best once he arrived.

I cant see how people pick names for their children before they are born, I think you need to see and get to know your little person before you decide on a name which will be set in stone for their future. Now that our son is born, and we have called him Aiden, when I look at him, I cant vision him being called anything else. He doesn't have a look of "Thomas" or "Robert/Bobby" to him. He really is an Aiden.

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